I have been frugal all my life. It is a way of life. I think my DNA makes me that way (just kidding). I believe that even if I had a lot of money I would still be frugal because I know that money is finite and can run out (look at all the broke athletes and movie stars). I like to think I would be like Warren Buffet and still drive an old pick-up truck and live in the same house I had before the money. Love that about him. I would be like the folks in the book "The Millionaire Next Door." You would probably never know.
This all leads me to my (sort of) rant. I listen to people every day that say they are desperate to save money. They are hungry for tips, tricks, advice and information. So I start asking questions. What bills do you have? Do you have a budget? Do you plan a menu each week? And several more questions. Answers are usually short and not much information. Then I ask the BIG question. How much are you willing to give up to get to your goal? How much pain can you take to make it to where you want to be? How bad do you really want this? I had to start asking these questions because at one point I would work on someone’s budget for a week and when I would give it to them I would always hear "I can't do this" or "I won't give that up." The answer is not surprising to me when they tell me they aren't willing to make any sacrifices, but they want the rewards without the work. How can this be??
The answer is that it is human nature to pick the easiest way out. I have gone beyond hearing the whining and the crying to hear the real truth. They are willing to do a few things to become solvent, but not the tough stuff. I constantly get people who are willing to coupon (which isn't always the best way to save money), but not willing to cut the cable or cut back on their expensive cell phone service. I know people who will drive 2 miles out of their way to save on a gallon of gas, but not give up the payments on their cars to drive something they can afford. I know some who say they are always bouncing checks, but won't take the time to balance a checkbook. They take the easy way out. I see this on my Facebook page when I start posting the really hardcore stuff, the real money saving advice that takes time and work: my readership goes down. When I post the cute tips and such the readership goes way up. People willing to do the easy stuff but not the hard things that really help.
I'm not saying to live in a cave and hunt your own prey (although if you can, that is wonderful). If you can afford the life you are living and you are living within your means then do what you'd like. In fact, the difference between being frugal and being cheap is that frugal people value their money and will save for the things they want in life. They will buy and have the things that are most important to them and with research and comparisons they will try to get the best value for their money. Cheap people won't. They will not spend and will sometimes stoop to unethical means to not part with their money. Some people get these two confused. What I am saying is if you can't afford to live the way you are living then life needs to change, even if it is only a temporary change. Who knows, you may actually get used to having a few extra dollars to do things after you are debt free (such as go to Alaska on vacation like I just did). It's because we had a plan and saved for it.
The excuses I hear and how defensive people get just blows me away sometimes. I swear I had this conversation with someone I know.
Hmmm Ms. Jackson, I see that you bring home $340 a week and you are having trouble buying food? Why don't you cut down that phone service that costs $130 a month and your cable?
My answer: What?? I need my phone! It's the only way I communicate. I have to have cable because the kids like it. I asked you how I can save on food, not change my life.
Again, it is human nature to not want to change, to keep up a front for others. To stay comfortable even if it means being under stress and pressure that bills can cause.
I live a simple life. I have a small home I can afford. I drive an older paid-for car that gets good gas mileage. I do not have cable, and just recently got a cell phone (without all the expensive bells and whistles). I have no bills except utilities and a mortgage that we will have paid off in about 5 years. I do my own ironing, cooking from scratch, and I work a full-time job. I make my own cleaners and I even made my own dog food for my late furbaby. To some it sounds extreme. To some I could do more. The point is that I choose to live within my means. It is a happy life because I don't stress. I don't live week to week worrying about bills or things like food and shelter. I realize bad things can happen and I have an emergency fund to take some of that worry away. I do not understand why anyone would put themselves through all the stress on purpose.
This rant is not intended for people who have been put in situations beyond their control, such as illness, injury, disasters and other things that have taken their savings. This is for those who make the choice that spending money they don't have for things they can't afford to impress people that don't matter have put themselves into.
I also want to applaud those who have done every possible thing in their lives to make it from week to week. I have some wonderful emails from those who have moved to farms and are almost totally self sufficient to be able to have what is important to them (such as being able to stay home to raise their children). There are some that work 2 or 3 jobs just to get out of debt. These people who made the decision to help themselves instead of sitting and crying are my heroes. I know the struggle that it takes. I married a man who came with a good bit of debt. We worked almost 2 years to get debt free and now work to stay that way.
You are the only ones that can make the choice. You can take the easy way and keep going the way you are going (to me that is the hardest way). Or you can take the hard road and change things so you can take it easy later. One of my favorite quotes is from Dave Ramsey, "Live like no one else so later you can live like no one else."
There is a word for living the simple life, it is happiness!
♥
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PREVIOUS "FRUGAL SALLY" ARTICLES IN MACARONI KID : NEPHILLY-EMC
Retailers Spend Billions to Outsmart You -- February 23, 2013
What Makes Me This Way -- May 11, 2012
Frugal Lessons Every Parent Should Teach Their Children -- May 18, 2012
What Would YOU Do For A Million Dollars? -- June 01, 2012
"Make It So" -- July 08, 2012
Lessons My Grandmother Taught Me -- October 05, 2012
My Resolutions -- December 30, 2012
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